A quandary...

Oh, how I do love those ellipsis...
Well, I am waxing philosophic at the moment so I thought I'd share a bit of what's crossed my mind. Funny what a couple pints will do when you are out of drinking shape. Fleeting thoughts like dust motes in the wind. They come and go. This one stuck as particularly poignant so I mused to share it with the masses of internet-dom.
Masses?
Who am I kidding. There may be three people who will ever read it.
But, a pretty verbose opening paragraph, no? My, aren't I the little wordsmith?

Anyway, on to the topic of my ruminations...

It has recently come to my attention that I am a hopeless idealist. Well, an idealist for certain. Hopefully not hopeless. Um, sure...ok.
The thought that graced my grey matter by zipping whimsically through my cerebral cognition, an apparent redundancy that appears unbounded, was that I am indeed an idealist. To my own detriment at times.
I sleep quite peacfully, knowing that I hold true to my ideals despite that they sometimes work against my benefit. I refuse to play the game. I will bend lip to no posterior. I expect others to live and act with integrity and respect for others. Crazy, huh?
So often however, people will brown-nose, kiss ass, backstab, manipulate and politically undermine those around them in order to advance themselves in given situations.
The quandary then, is how do I stop being an idealist, yet still keep my ideals.
I think it's possible but difficult to achieve this. To maintain the ideals and values that I hold dear without giving too much weight and consequence to those who throw them aside.
It may be a life long journey.
I think I'll read up on buddhism.